Lost Time

I've lost so much time this week.

I've slept for literally half of it.

Not cool.

But what I think that's more important that I'm losing is my focus: focus on God, focus on other people, focus on my duty, focus on anything but the television and music notes on a page. Also, not cool.

I guess this is just my way of ranting out about how I'm slowly wandering away from God, and how I desperately desire to get back as soon as possible. I picked up my Bible and read a passage for the first time in a week last night. It felt really good. I'm just being lazy and letting myself slip up in really minor but unnecessary ways. I need to spend a lot of time in prayer and meditation, as well as reading old familiar passages in the Bible which remind me of why my faith in God is so strong, and bring me back to Him so we can further our relationship.

On that note, I feel as though Christmas sometimes does exactly the opposite of what it's supposed to: it takes our focus OFF of Christ and His birth. I mean yeah, everyone knows it's commercialized, and blah blah blah, and then you've got every Christian in the world tweeting and updating their statuses about how Jesus is the real reason for the season, and while this is very true, it's very rarely what any of us focuses on truly. I can't think of one person I know who isn't receiving gifts this year. Sure, they've given their time to non-profit organizations, their money to charities, their old toys and coats to ministries that will give them to the needy, but when's the last time America spent Christmas day in prayer with the Creator who sent His Son to earth for us? That's what this day is for, after all. Gifts are great; so are charities; but God is greater.

I say this in hypocrisy because I will be getting presents this year, like every year. This just goes to show that I've got a long way to go until I can truly announce to everyone that I have put every ounce of myself into God so that all I want to do is give until I have nothing left but Him; until I trust Him with everything and I'm not greedy or selfish - the traits that we most often see at during this time of year.

My apologies for the grim post, it's just what's on my mind at the moment, as I lay in bed with my computer on my stomach listening to Starfield and just typing away.

Let's just make it a Silent Night.

A very Merry Christmas to you all!